Bedtime reading (if you enjoy nightmares)
Reader Craig Vorselen has sent me this link to a Crains New York article on layoffs in the financial industry and this equally cheerful one about foreclosures in NYC. If you don’t like reading phrases like”jobs are evaporating across the financial industry” and “there’s no one left for job seekers to network with anymore” you’d be better off avoiding the first story but if your misery loves company, read away.
For what it’s worth (to coin a phrase) I used to console and counsel fellow lawyers who’d lost their corporate jobs and who wanted to know what it was like flying solo. They liked the bit about being their own boss but always looked crestfallen when I got to the parts like, “you only eat what you kill” and “the staff payroll’s due every week – your salary isn’t”. Most went on to find another job they hated with another corporation. The few who broke free, either of the corporate world or law or both always seemed much happier. So if things look dark, remember that old annoying cliche that so often proves true: for every door that shuts, another one opens. Works for me.
Amazing wonders in real estate pricing
So there are three houses currently for sale on Old Church Road, a great street very close to town.
149 Old Church is an 1899 house, renovated in 2006, on 1.48 acres and assessed (70%) at $2.336 million. It started in April at $3.795 and has now dropped to $3.200. 5,920 sq.ft.
163 Old Church was built in 1950 and renovated in 2008. It’s on 0.96 acres, assessed at $1,637 million and is currently offered for sale for $3.750.
56 Old Church was built in 1905 and never renovated – a buyer will have to start by gutting it entirely and starting anew. Unspecified square footage but far smaller than either of the first two. Assessed at $1.376, it’s asking $3.750
I have two questions: are these houses on the same street, and did either of the latter two ask what happened with the first one? Inquiring minds want to know.
What’s happening with Bentleys?
By Amanda Von Stuckle
What with all this fooferall about house prices dropping a teensey bit I decided to vist my pal George Louderkin III, the wonderful salesman who sold me my first luxury car years ago when I cashed out of the internet boom. The man’s a saint, as you can see.
George seemed relaxed, if unoccupied when I stopped by so after the obligatory buss on both cheeks and the air kiss (George is so emotive!) we got down to business.
AVS: So George, how are you doing, and how are my friends handling all this? Are they still buying your cars?
GL III: Absolutely, Amanda, like they’ve never heard of a CDO in their lives.
AVS: That’s great. What about the other salesmen here – same story?
GL III: What other salesmen?
GL III: Like yesterday’s news, baby. Half are selling Fords, the other half went into real estate. Except for Jerry – remember Jerry? He’s out back washing cars.
AVS: But you’re doing okay?
GL III: You bet. especially with this new discount program we got going: 110% off.
AVS: 110%? but that’s –
GL III: You got it, Baby. We pay you to take the sucker away. Ya want an Arnage? Top of the line Bentley. $255,000 retail, so we give you the car and pay you $25,500 for your trouble.
AVS: That’s incredible. Does it come with, you know, tires and a radio?
GL III: Those things’ll cost a little more; say, top out at $350 K.
AVS: So I’d get …
GL III: $35,000. Uh huh.
AVS: How are you going to stay in business this way?
GL III: Volume, Baby, we make it back in volume. And especially if you want a loan.
AVS: Why would I want a loan if you’re paying me to take the car?
GL III: It’s a special deal we got going. We give you a little more, say $50 grand, you sign a promissory note for $100 big ones and we sell it.
AVS: But then I’d owe money …
GL III: Not if no one knows who you are.
AVS: But you know who I am.
GL III: Not if you take out a loan I don’t. Sign the papers – Miss Penelope Strong, I don’t give a f..k, and I never heard of you in my life.
AVS: And this is legal?
GL III: Sure it is, Baby. just ask Hank Paulson.
AVS: Our Treasury Secretary? Is he in town?
GL III: He’s staying up at Dickie Fuld’s place, in the guest cottage. But yeah – call him, see if he sees anything wrong with this. I’m telling ya now, he won’t: who do you think came up with the idea? Goldman Effin Sachs, that’s who.
AVS: That’s great – I’ll take one. You have a convertible?
GL III: You got it. Any choice in color?
O.K., The Greenwich market is down
Have you considered investing in Nigeria?
But be careful, as the linked website warns,
Lagos Nigeria real estate market is a vast property market where a newcomer can get easily lost and cheated by scammers.
Lagos Nigeria property scammers are everywhere. Lose your guard and you risk losing your hard-earned money.
Fortunately for you, these guys say they’re honest.
Denver Commercial Real Estate Exec:
This could get ugly.
But there’s this:
“Santora added that Denver is one of the three strongest markets in the country, with the other two being Houston (because of its energy sector employment) and Washington, D.C.”
Hmm – wonder what they grow in Washington, D.C.?
The stock market’s up today, so far
I suspect that our President isn’t the only one holding his breath.
But the credit market, which powers the world’s economy, is a mess. I think we’re in trouble, Toto.
Offers I never finish reading
Or wouldn’t if I didn’t need material for this blog. I just received an invitation from a new real estate agency in town to meet someone named “Niurka” – no last name, which doesn’t make me comfortable – to learn “What moves your clients to action”, “Master your state of mind” and “Discover the driving force of your life by grasping the Power of Identity”.
No mention of booze or mushrooms to further enhance this “Powerful Experience” but lucky attendees will have an opportunity to inspect an over-priced condominium that’s been on the market since Noah began nailing wood together to form that boat. I Googled Niurka and found this Wikipedia entry:
Niurka Marcos (born Niurka Melanie Marcos Calle on November 25, 1967 in Havana, Cuba) is a Cuban singer, dancer, actress, and erotic model. She is better known simply as Niurka.
She was a little-known actress in Cuba. Marcos already had a son when she moved to Mexico, whom she left behind to look for a better future.
Niurka had a son, Kiko, in 1991 and a daughter, Romina in 1995. She has not disclosed the father of either child.
In Mexico, she had mild success acting in telenovelas with Televisa, until she met producer Juan Osorio. Marcos and Osorio began dating in 1998. Marcos then became a star in many of Osorio’s productions. They moved in together and had a son, Emilio, in 2002.
Marcos and Osorio were planning to get married in February 2004. Early in January, however, she revealed to the Mexican media, and the Latin American media in the United States, that she had been having an affair with her Velo de Novia co-star Bobby Larios, and that she was leaving Osorio for Larios. The news caused a wide-spread scandal and Marcos has not spared Osorio from public insult, blaming the break-up on, among other things, lack of sexual relations between the two.
“Erotic model”, eh? Maybe I do need another look at that condo.