Monthly Archives: December 2008

Wait a minute, that’s my bank!

I bank with Greenwich Bank & Trust and a fine bank it is. But it merged with Westport National Bank four years ago and became Connecticut Community Bank and now that larger entity is being sued by defrauded Madoff investors. It’s Walt Noel and Fairfield Greenwich Group, writ small: Westport Bank took a couple’s money, charged them 4% a year for the privilege of having them watch over it for them and on December 12, the day Bernie was arrested, sent them a letter saying that, gosh, they’d invested the whole thing with Mr. Madoff and would the couple like them to write a letter to Mr. Madoff, asking that he give their money back?

I have great faith in Greenwich Bank & Trust and I trust them to keep my piddling earnings safe but back when I hunted stockbrokers my colleagues and I cheered when banks went into the  brokerage business. We were sure that they’d prove incompetent at suggesting wise investments and our subsequent paydays courtesy of arbitration panels proved us right. Never ever trust a bank’s retail “investment advisor’, is my advice. Certainly, don’t count on Westport National Bank to safeguard your money.

Comments Off

Filed under Uncategorized

Will the real George Lindemann Jr. stand up?

I’ve had trouble finding a picture of the young horse killer. Here’s one, taken from a 2007 Alumni letter that purports to be of George Sr. (I’ve also seen it identified as the younger). If it’s Senior, the poor bastard’s aged terribly, judging from a New York Social Diary celebrity post. Does anyone have access to Georgie’s mugshot?

 

"Ahoy, sailor!"

"Ahoy, sailor!"

UPDATE: Here’s the real McCoy, courtesy of reader Jess (and WireImage)

 

"Dig those glasses,Ariane!"

"Dig those glasses,Ariane!"

 

 

 

 

NY Social Diary (Lindemann on right) 

Credit: NY Social Diary (Lindemann on right)

3 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Did Bernie disclose all his assets today?

He had until 5:00 p.m. SEC hasn’t said whether they’ll make that list public but I’m sure it will come out – this story’s too much fun to keep things quiet. The Wall Street Journal suggests that Madoff would be wise to also disclose his offshore accounts but I don’t know – he’s already facing an almost certain life sentence, so how can he be punished further for perpetrating another tiny fraud?  I’d try to keep the accounts secret, “for the kids”. Of course, if I were a defrauded investor, I’d have already booked a flight to Mustique to see what’s in Noel’s villa’s walls.

Update, Jan. 1, 2009 (happy New year!): He disclosed, but, for now, the SEC won’t kiss and tell. Speculation by one commentator suggests that much of what’s left of the loot is in offshore accounts and the SEC wants to get to it before foreign countries seize it for their defrauded citizens. Fun, fun fun.

7 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Should house prices follow suit?

2008 wiped out six years of stock gains.

2 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Who is George Lindemann, Jr.?

 

Oh, Monica, how can you laugh? George is back to frying frogs and im sure puppies are next!"

"Oh, Monica, how can you laugh? George is back to frying frogs and I'm sure puppies are next!"

For anyone who missed the story, George Lindemann Jr. is the son of one of the wealthiest men in the world, George Lindemann Sr., of Greenwich and Palm Beach. George Junior grew up in Greenwich and graduated from Brown but his heart was set on being an Olympian. To further that end dad bought his boy Cellular Farm (one of dad’s fortunes was made in cellular communications) in Armonk, New York, just up the road from Greenwich. Georgie proved as inept at managing a horse farm as he was at riding and dad eventually grew tired of footing the bills for a failed venture. “Make the place profitable” he warned,”or I shut the place down.”

 

Georgie was in a panic. He’d spent $250,000 of his father’s money on “Charisma”, a jumper that was supposed to bring fame, and a subsequent improvement in fortunes, to George and cellular Farms. But the horse was a bust. Rather than admit defeat or plead with his father for more time, Georgie hired a professional horse killer to come up to Armonk and electrocute his horse. If you aren’t squeamish, here’s how a horse is killed for insurance purposes: the killer takes a heavy-duty extension cord and cuts off the female end, replacing it with two alligator clips attached by a long wire. One clip is attached to the horse’s ear, the other to his anus and the cord’s plugged into a wall socket. The lights flicker, the horse starts to fry and eventually his guts blow up, simulating a fatal case of horse colic. Horses are big and rot quickly so their bodies usually don’t hang around long enough for an insurance adjuster to view the corpse. Instead, the owner either buries it immediately or pays the local large animal veterinarian to sign off on the cause of death and then brings in the bulldozer. So long as the killer is careful not to leave obvious scorch marks around the anus, no one complains too loudly, especially if the vet is paid handsomely for his troubles.

Georgie was convicted of his crimes. Sentenced to jail, he never attended – in fact, as far as we can determine, he never even endured a full body cavity search – there are some things you just don’t do to the son of the richest man in town. He has retreated to Miami, Florida, where he now poses as a patron of the arts, philanthropist and all-around decent good citizen. His parents, of course, are best friends with Walter and Monica Noel. What a small world.

4 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Testimony to Teenagers’ Powers of Persuasion

Virginity pledges don’t mean much, study says. Okay, so the kids can’t write – they’re obviously prepared to sell real estate or stocks, however and the latter two pay far more than the former.

Comments Off

Filed under Uncategorized

Horse investments tank, Miami Philanthropist George Lindemann Jr. steps in to help.

 

"Kill him AFTER I'm done riding, you idiot!"

"Kill him AFTER I'm done riding, you idiot!"

The price of thoroughbreds drops 40% so Fairfield Greenwich Group’s Jeffrey Tucker will be selling into a falling market. Oh, what will we do, what will we do?!

Say, wait a minute, I’ve got an idea!

1 Comment

Filed under Uncategorized