As God is my witness, they’re not going to lick me. I’m going to live through this and when it’s all over, I’ll never be hungry again. No, nor any of my folk. If I have to lie, steal, cheat or kill. As God is my witness, I’ll never be hungry again.

(A reader just complained about this post being mean – I dug it up and think it’s still funny so here it is again – sorry, reader)

Earlier this week we reported that Kathy Fuld has stopped buying $30,000 of bedsheets a month from Greenwich Avenue’s own Lynnens. Now, courtesy of Page Six we can tell you equally startling news: Bob Jaffe, Bernie Madoff’s Palm Beach bagman, has stopped seeing his manicurist and is doing his nails himself.  So naturally, in view of these stirring tales of self-sacrifice by the financially afflicted, we wondered how the Noel family was bearing up. A quick trip up to 175 Round Hill Road revealed the answer: with the help of caddy boys from Round Hill Club, Monica and the Fabulous Five are standing firm – they’re fit and rarin’ to go. Here’s one of the daughters now, getting a mudpack and a manicure. Does she look worried?

Thank you, Adolfo. Don't forget Mom's oats.

Thank you, Adolfo. Don't forget Mom's oats.

5 Comments

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5 responses to “As God is my witness, they’re not going to lick me. I’m going to live through this and when it’s all over, I’ll never be hungry again. No, nor any of my folk. If I have to lie, steal, cheat or kill. As God is my witness, I’ll never be hungry again.

  1. NYCT101

    Thats pretty mean. I am not happy with this or the way they have treated people over the years but come on…how attractive are you?
    What if people showed a photo of you under LURCH the butler of Addams Family fame?

  2. Flaubert's bear

    Definitely turned into horses of a different color…….or is that sailing under false colors? ‘Spose they’ll be sporting racing stripes soon. Neighs from the North.

  3. Owl

    If you had ever met Lynne Jenkins, the owner of Lynnens, you would retract your comments involving her store as she is one of the nicest people on the planet. Rest assured that the Fuld’s are not her only client.

    • christopherfountain

      I don’t believe I said anything hurtful about the proprietress at all – to the contrary, I was sympathetic to her plight and the plight of all small store owners trying to fight off the chains and stay on Greenwich Avenue. The readers comments all make clear that she’s a great person.

  4. Please visit my shop at http://www.lynnens.com/lynnens/default.asp?s_id=0
    If you have more money than brains like Walt or his bumbling sons in law, please come in and spend $1,500 on a solid colored fitted sheet. Like maybe white? Marisa and Mark just bought a bunch for their “market peak” town house in New York. That idiot Andres spent $2,500 on a sheet and used it to play a ghost for Holloween.