Vacation day

Unable to resist that player piano’s charms any longer, I’m off to Greenwich Hospital today for a bit of minor (minor to you, but it’s not you they’re cutting) surgery on my elbow. Should be back soon and posting one-handed snarky comments as usual but until then, … radio silence. Catch you when we reenter the atmosphere.

21 Comments

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21 responses to “Vacation day

  1. Al Dente

    That is the only hospital I’ve been in that doesn’t smell like a hospital. I thought it was a hotel.

    I think Ima make some elbow macaroni and cheese today, all I can afford. Can you still get government cheese?

  2. Drew Marzullo

    Good luck Chris

  3. Peg

    Even with only 5 fingers and a thumb, I bet you’ll tap out a bunch of great posts, CF. GL in the operating theatre!! (And make damn sure they operate on the PROPER side!)

  4. Walt

    Dude –
    It sounds like you have a case of spankitis elbow, also referred to as “rub love syndrome”. Have you been walking around with Popeye arm?

    The good news is it is a safe, routine procedure to fix. Tell them you would prefer that they enter through your anus. The bad news is you won’t be able to use your body as your sinful playpen for a few weeks, unless you learn how to switch hit, which isn’t a bad idea. You should always try and mix it up.

    As far as the typing goes, I suggest you just put a long, sharp object in your mouth, and then you can peck the keyboard like a bird using its beak. Use a screwdriver, or a sharp knife. You may want to put some crazy glue on your tongue so it doesn’t slip.

    Let me know how that works out for you. And who schedules surgery the day before the world ends? You dummy.
    Feel better!!
    Your Pal,
    Walt

  5. Walt

    Dude –
    And while you are in, have them check you for PGAD “Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder”. It can be serious:

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/12/19/suicide-spotlights-persistent-genital-arousal-disorder.html

    Ask a hot nurse or a candy striper to check this for you. Heck, you might as well ask them all to check this for you. And wear your gown backwards. They always get a kick out of that!!

    Good Luck!!
    Your Pal,
    Walt

  6. D

    Good luck Chris. No better place to be, IMO.

  7. Mickster

    Will this help you reach for your wallet more often? LOL

  8. anonymous

    Sound of one hand clapping:

  9. butt Reduction

    Because you are a pain in my ass
    -walter noel

  10. Libertarian Advocate

    As the Frenchies say, MERDE!

  11. Anonymous

    Nice work Walt
    Not sure FWIW could survive without you
    Keep it coming

  12. Cos Cobber

    Good luck buddy!

  13. winstonthegreat

    keep your hands off the new Electronic Medical Record system Epic that Yale is spending $300,000,000.00 on!

  14. JRH

    Speedy recovery!

  15. Babylon Sister

    Make sure they’ve got the correct elbow before they start cutting :P

    http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/11/28/when-surgeons-cut-the-wrong-body-part/

  16. Walt

    Dude –
    You are back!! How did it go? It is never to soon to start rehab, so I took the liberty of developing a physical therapy routine for you. Do just what this therapist tells you to do and you will be back in tip top shape in no time:

    Listen to the teacher!!
    Your Pal,
    Walt

  17. Peg

    The more I think about it, the more I appreciate how fortunate Christopher is to be having this surgery NOW… A few more months into Obamacare – they’d likely simply REMOVE the arm from the elbow down! Or…. even just pull the plug on poor Christopher!

  18. Anonymous

    Did you happen to see the Noel’s in the hospital claiming mental illness or getting face-altering plastic surgery to they can quietly escape to Mustique and avoid extradition?

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-12-20/peter-madoff-gets-10-years-for-aiding-brother-s-ponzi-scheme-1-.html

  19. Fred2

    “Or…. even just pull the plug on poor Christopher!”

    I think it’s more invasive that pulling the plug, he might linger for years yet, so they’ll have to take active measures.