Unable to resist that player piano’s charms any longer, I’m off to Greenwich Hospital today for a bit of minor (minor to you, but it’s not you they’re cutting) surgery on my elbow. Should be back soon and posting one-handed snarky comments as usual but until then, … radio silence. Catch you when we reenter the atmosphere.
Good luck.
That is the only hospital I’ve been in that doesn’t smell like a hospital. I thought it was a hotel.
I think Ima make some elbow macaroni and cheese today, all I can afford. Can you still get government cheese?
Good luck Chris
Even with only 5 fingers and a thumb, I bet you’ll tap out a bunch of great posts, CF. GL in the operating theatre!! (And make damn sure they operate on the PROPER side!)
Dude –
It sounds like you have a case of spankitis elbow, also referred to as “rub love syndrome”. Have you been walking around with Popeye arm?
The good news is it is a safe, routine procedure to fix. Tell them you would prefer that they enter through your anus. The bad news is you won’t be able to use your body as your sinful playpen for a few weeks, unless you learn how to switch hit, which isn’t a bad idea. You should always try and mix it up.
As far as the typing goes, I suggest you just put a long, sharp object in your mouth, and then you can peck the keyboard like a bird using its beak. Use a screwdriver, or a sharp knife. You may want to put some crazy glue on your tongue so it doesn’t slip.
Let me know how that works out for you. And who schedules surgery the day before the world ends? You dummy.
Feel better!!
Your Pal,
Walt
Dude –
And while you are in, have them check you for PGAD “Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder”. It can be serious:
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/12/19/suicide-spotlights-persistent-genital-arousal-disorder.html
Ask a hot nurse or a candy striper to check this for you. Heck, you might as well ask them all to check this for you. And wear your gown backwards. They always get a kick out of that!!
Good Luck!!
Your Pal,
Walt
Good luck Chris. No better place to be, IMO.
Will this help you reach for your wallet more often? LOL
Sound of one hand clapping:
Because you are a pain in my ass
-walter noel
As the Frenchies say, MERDE!
Nice work Walt
Not sure FWIW could survive without you
Keep it coming
Good luck buddy!
keep your hands off the new Electronic Medical Record system Epic that Yale is spending $300,000,000.00 on!
Speedy recovery!
Make sure they’ve got the correct elbow before they start cutting
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/11/28/when-surgeons-cut-the-wrong-body-part/
Dude -
You are back!! How did it go? It is never to soon to start rehab, so I took the liberty of developing a physical therapy routine for you. Do just what this therapist tells you to do and you will be back in tip top shape in no time:
Listen to the teacher!!
Your Pal,
Walt
The more I think about it, the more I appreciate how fortunate Christopher is to be having this surgery NOW… A few more months into Obamacare – they’d likely simply REMOVE the arm from the elbow down! Or…. even just pull the plug on poor Christopher!
Did you happen to see the Noel’s in the hospital claiming mental illness or getting face-altering plastic surgery to they can quietly escape to Mustique and avoid extradition?
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-12-20/peter-madoff-gets-10-years-for-aiding-brother-s-ponzi-scheme-1-.html
“Or…. even just pull the plug on poor Christopher!”
I think it’s more invasive that pulling the plug, he might linger for years yet, so they’ll have to take active measures.