Missing Chris Yet?

(Gideon Fountain writing for the vacationing Christopher Fountain)

Of course you do!  Here’s a Chris-type image to think about

(Ladies: sorry, couldn’t find the nude-guys-in-fishing-gear source).

28 Comments

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28 responses to “Missing Chris Yet?

  1. Walt

    Fake Dude –
    Here is what you should do while you know who is gone. Total website redesign. Change his blogroll to totally liberal links. Put positive pictures of Nancy P. and Barack in the masthead. Change useful links to hotlink the DNC, Acorn, and others.
    Finally, if you are using his PC, crazy glue the keyboard just before he gets back.
    Just some thoughts.
    Your Pal,
    Walt

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding)
      Fake Walt:
      Do this to a guy with whom I play tennis and shoot pistols? No can do! (Still, that part about inserting links to ACORN I really like)

  2. RTM Townie

    And here we thought Gideon’s posts would raise the level of this blog a bit …. ah, well.

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding)

      RTM:
      Oh tut, tut, old chum. Listen, I have Chris’s regular readers to worry about here, don’t I? Some of these perverts have come to expect a certain, um, “standard”.

  3. Not to be critical Gideon, because I think you’re doing a terrific job, but the trick is to find a picture like that which is somehow related to a story, and then link to the story. You know, like the angry Owl Gore picture linked to a story about record breaking cold weather.

    Keep up the great work.

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding)

      Richard:
      Yes, yes, thank you, I know. I was being, er…”ironic”. No, not ironic… I was PARODYING the Chris Fountain method. In the future, I shall..you know…

  4. dogwalker

    I knew something was missing . . . couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

  5. Priapus

    Talk about throwing heat coming out of the bullpen…

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding)

      Priapus: Life-long Yankee fan notwithstanding, I was forced to Google this phrase “throwing heat out of the bullpen” and wade through many long-winded sports sites, looking for a reference. I have concluded that you mean to compliment my efforts on my brother’s blog…

  6. cos cobber

    Thanks gid. Its probably better that you don’t have access to your brothe’s perverse photo stash.

  7. John

    Well done, I believe you have a future in this kind of work,

    BR,

    John

  8. Anonymous

    You are wrong to say that this is a “Chris-type image,” and it calls into question whether you actually follow your brother’s blog.

    Idealized images of women have never been CF’s style. He is much more inclined toward the grotesque, such as the photos he posts of his famous Scusie gossip columnist.

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding)

      Anonymous: I dispute your characterization of that Wicked Weasel model as some sort of an “idealized image”. First of all, she is quite thin. Many men would describe her shape as not up to snuff. So, in summation, while certainly attractive, she is far from ideal. Thank you for your interest.

  9. not so anonymous

    ” First of all, she is quite thin. Many men would describe her shape as not up to snuff. So, in summation, while certainly attractive, she is far from ideal. ”

    Gotta love that Fountain thinking…. xxoo… : )

  10. NORTHIDAHO

    Miss Chris? Nah we just use this to get the link to his daughter’s blog!

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding for Christopher Fountain)

      NorthIdaho:
      Ha! You do that, too??

  11. Priapus

    Gideon, i’m watching you. YOU, YOU’RE good!

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon responding for Chris)

      Priapus:
      Well, thank you, Mr. “Personification of the erect phallus”. What an unusual screen-name.

  12. Front Row Phil

    I agree with Priapus. That photo was all I needed to know that all will continue to be right with the world — and with this blog.

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon responding for Chris)

      Front Row Phil:
      You say that now, but wait till I track down Chris’s source for nude male fishermen…

  13. Owl Gore

    Gideon-

    Here’s a couple of computer tips. When you have to Google a phrase, (and with CF I have to do this all the time) first store it on the clipboard with a Ctrl-C.

    When the articles come up, then you Ctrl-F (Find) and Ctrl-V (Paste), and then flip through the highlighted Finds with the Next button. If you use the cached version, google will do this for you automatically with color highlights. For example:

    “and the Yankee blogs were packed with “ZOMG HUGHES IS A BUST BECAUSE HE CAN’T THROW HARDER THAN 92!!! ” for the last 2-3 years until he starts pumping 97mph heat out of the bullpen.”

    Find the funniest ironic reference you can, and put it in your repost(e).

    Tip#2: The funny words Chris puts under those outrageous pictures is the key to how he found them in Google. Actually, Bing does a better job now.

    Thanks for taking on this thankless task. My advice: Raise the level of discourse here by concentrating on the core mission of FWIW. Use your knowledge of what sells and why to explain how the market arrived at its final price, For What It’s Worth.

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon responding for Chris)

      OwlGore:
      Thanks, old boy, I shall take your “tips” under advisement.

  14. Priapus

    Personification nothing. Like the end of the ads say “In the rare case that blogging lasts for more than four hours, seek immediate medical attention.”

  15. Fake Walt

    There seems to have been a case of mistaken idendity. Allow me to clear things up.

    “Walt” is the original fake Walt. He makes people laugh with his special brand of humor. People like him even when he is a pain in the ass.

    “Fake Walt” (me) is a fake. He tries to be funny but falls flat everytime. “Walt” thinks he is Hiram but he is not.

    I hope that helps.

    Off to Paris

    Kind Regards,

    Fake Walt

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon responding for Chris)

      Fake Walt:
      “Walt” called me “Fake Dude”, as in, not the real Chris Fountain (presumably) and I mistakenly addressed him as “Fake Walt”. Won’t happen again.

  16. not so anonymous

    Where are you? Sundays off, ok, but it’s 4:30 pm your time Monday the 15th already…I’m jonesing for an update on all things Greenwich..

    • christopherfountain

      (Gideon Fountain responding to his sister for Christopher Fountain)

      Sorry! Power’s been out since, I think, oh, 5:00 PMish, Saturday night. Today I had much to do relating to the way I actually make a living (you know, selling real estate) but now, by gum, I’m back! Anyone still reading?