Promise to install hundred-foot-diameter drainage pipe sways gullible P&Z Commission

Erf Porter: "Cost is no object!"

34 Park Avenue Old Greenwich resident and  “character” Erf Porter won approval last night from a spineless P&Z to subdivide his 0.2 acre home site into five separate parcels. “Sure it seems extreme,” P&Z member Frankie Fudrucker acknowledged to FWIW’s Scusie, “but the cost of solving the flooding on Park  is $100 million, and Erf’s promised to foot half of that. We’d be nuts to turn down fifty  million bucks.”

Pressed on how Mr. Porter, a retired lemonade salesman, could be counted on to come up with such a large sum, Fudrucker shrugged – “that’s his problem, isn’t it?  I mean, if we go ahead and spend all that money fixing the drainage problem and Erf stiffs the town, Tesei is going to be some kind of pissed. And,” he paused, “then Erf’s problem will be Peter’s,  won’t it?”

Fudrucker refused Scusie’s offer of a handkerchief with which to dry his tears.

7 Comments

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7 responses to “Promise to install hundred-foot-diameter drainage pipe sways gullible P&Z Commission

  1. Anonymous

    “Erf” Porter is now, has been and always will be an asshole.

    ‘Nuff said.

  2. Stanwich

    Erf is nothing what anonymous said. I know him personally and he is genuinely a good guy. What might piss people off here is that Erf is very involved in town politics and has a lot of connections — which might give the impression that he is receiving preferential treatment from town agencies/boards. Having said that, I don’t think he got any special deal given that he had to litigate and give a big improvement to get it done.

    • Oh hell, Stan, while I have only met Erf once, i worked in the same small law office with his wife Jane and think she’s a peach. I was just having some fun at Fudrucker’s expense. And you’re right: this subdivision idea of Erf’s has occupied him for many years, and he must have spent a fortune in legal fees proving his case. I do think it’s a dumb idea to take an already-small lot and divide it in two, but as Erf has proved, that’s his right.

  3. cos cobber

    what size will each subdivided lot be?

  4. happy in riverside

    I too have know Erf for 20+ years. It would be hard to find someone who is more involved in civic organizations and volunteer activities – between Sound Beach Vol. Fire Dept band, the Civic Center rebuilding project, Old Timers, RTC, Lions Club…..you name it, he’s there. Old school mentality that we all should labor to make this town a great place – not expect it to just “happen”. I enjoy this website but don’t think someone should be allowed to call someone else names “anonymously” without giving reason.