Judge Judy was seen gumming her new dentures at Dr. Ernie Whittle’s emporium on Sound Beach Avenue, while her husband, Judge Jerry Sheindlin, was being fitted for a colostomy bag at CVS.
Cody Gifford, son of Frank and Kathie Lee, was whupped by Frank at Valbella’s for sins unknown.
Regis and Joy Philbin tried to dine at Riverside’s McDonalds but were escorted out by the Greenwich Police – no word why, but Regis was tasered in the parking lot. Details to follow.
A local gossip reporter was pepper sprayed and tasered this evening after being caught coupling with a Dave Matthews Band roadie above the high water mark at Belle Haven. Ordered to cease and desist, she was heard to protest, “it hasn’t been ten minutes! I haven’t had ten minutes!”