Chicago-style voting comes to Hartford

Of COURSE I'm Thurston "Chip" Cadwallader - you sayin' I ain't?

State Democrats bringing in same day voter registration. Democrat spokesman Frankie Fudrucker explains why:

“It just makes it easier,”  Fudrucker said when interviewed by FWIW’s intrepid reporter Scusie. “It’s hard enough to round up all the crack we need, wrap it up as party favors – get that? “Party Favors”? Huh huh huh – pass it out and get these yokels to the polls to vote for the team. And sure, we got rid of the i.d. requirement but proving they’re registered? Come on, how ya gonna get some drug-addled bum to remember the name we gave him six months ago? And then, what happens if between registering him and the actual election he gets picked up and deported? Bam! All that effort wasted. No no, we want a ‘slam bang, thank you ma’am’ process – quick, easy and all in one day.”

“Look,” he continued, “to succeed, we need a base of uneducated po ‘folk who are completely ignorant of the issues, and the place to find them is in the ghetto not, for Christ’s sake, in white suburbs; well, there’s this guy we know in Greenwich, ‘Dollar Bill’ who votes six or seven times each election but we need more than just him or people will see right through our scam and vote us out of office. Then, what, we have to work for a living? Like that’s gonna happen.”


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5 responses to “Chicago-style voting comes to Hartford

  1. G W Chase

    Like they would say – “vote early and vote often”.

  2. Libertarian Advocate

    Fudrucker is remarkably candid… for a Demoncrat.

  3. AJ

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