After a wait of almost 375 years, Greenwich gets a fire boat

All aboard for fun! Sister ship arrives in Norwalk

All aboard for fun! Sister ship arrives in Norwalk

$600,000 in pork barrel sludge, $24,000 per year (estimated, bound to go higher) maintenance, we’re taking delivery of a 39′ North River fireboat. How have we gotten along without it all this time? What are we going to do with it now? “Beats me”, says our Emergency Director, “but Norwalk’s got one, so we want one too. A fine town like Greenwich shown up by friggin’ Norwalk? Not on my watch.”

Let’s hope the boat performs better than North River’s former owner, who, while being investigated by the FBI for wire fraud, shot his girlfriend three times with a shotgun. She died.


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8 responses to “After a wait of almost 375 years, Greenwich gets a fire boat

  1. Walt

    Dude –
    I understand Barry is coming to Newtown tomorrow night:

    You fancy yourself a reporter, so can you get us press credentials? How about Francis? Can he use some of his corrupt Democratic political juice to get us a sit down with the Prez? With these politicians he carries around in his pocket like so many nickels and dimes? Godfather Dude!!

    This visit shows the Dem’s are planning a full frontal assault on the Second Amendment. So I think we should ask him some questions, OK? I will do the filming and you can ask the questions.

    Here is what you need to ask:

    If people don’t kill guns, but guns kill people, why can’t we all just get along?

    In Kenya, your birth place, the highest deaths are due to tobacco use, hacking and fires. Should we send them guns to shoot these people and make the country safer?

    Chicago, your adult illegal alien home town, has the strictest gun laws in the country. But the highest murder rate. Why is that? And why is black on black crime, which is like 90% of the problem, ignored by the MSM? But white on black crime, which is about 10% of the problem, depicts us as a racist nation? Don’t you find that odd? And maybe a tad biased?

    Are Wookies aloud to carry?

    Hitler, Stalin, and that gook Mao Mao, all prevented citizens from owning guns. How did that work out for their citizens? Are they your role models? Or are you just a Judy Garland fan?

    I will work on more, but get us a sit down.
    This is important.
    Your Pal,

  2. I would be surprised if 24 grand was all it takes to run such a boat. Maybe if you don’t leave the dock…..

    • So far as I can see, the only reason for it to leave the dock will be to serve as a fishing platform: we’d effect an economy by giving the marine patrol unlimited, open charge accounts at Fjord Fisheries.

  3. greenwich dude

    can we put the money toward a new fire station instead? send this thing to eBay immediately

  4. Let Ian use it as his Harbormaster Vessel…he could put out fires real and fake….
    His $ 375 per year salary would be a real savings to…….

  5. anonymous

    Binney Lane fire?

    • Article specifically notes that the boat would have been useless in the Binney Lane fire for a number of reasons, not the least of which was that the Coast Guard closed the waters to all shipping, include local fire department fishing craft.

  6. another stb 4 me

    Just insane …