Christmas in Hell


Soooo, you want to sit on my lap, do you?

Soooo, you want to sit on my lap, do you?

Day trip to Father Christmas’s Workshop in Finland strands hundreds of children and their parents

Hairdresser Michelle, who booked the trip through Canterbury Travel, said: ‘It was meant to be a once-in-a-lifetime fairytale trip, but it’s been awful.

‘Even the trip itself was disappointing. I thought Lapland was going to be magical, but it’s been a disaster.

‘We had to wait outside in minus 30 degrees in a queue to see Father Christmas and when it was finally the kids’ turn I fainted because I was so cold.

‘We were told we would be having snowball fights with elves, but the elves were moody and wouldn’t even talk to us.”



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One response to “Christmas in Hell

  1. Walt

    Dude –
    So let me get this right. They go to Lapland and its freezing cold. Duh. If you want a warm Lapland, go to Beamers, you dummies.

    And the elves were moody? No shit Sherlock. They go through life with people farting in their faces. You would be moody too. And you are lucky they didn’t fight you. They are nasty little bastards, part serial killer, and would have shoved a snowball up your frozen ass.

    Fairy lights? What are fairy lights? You should have gone to Greenwich Village for that. And no complaints about the reindeers? Did you see any? They smell like shit, and drop turds everywhere. Consider yourself lucky.

    Just buy the kid “Call of Duty” and pop him in front of an X-Box. He will be fine.
    Your Pal,