Bill Gaston, chairman of the Greenwich Democrat Peace and Love Committee, spoke with FWIW this morning to reassure all of us that everything is going to be just fine up there in Watertown.
“Massachusetts has one of the toughest gun laws in the country,” Bill tells us, “and they’ve reduced licensed gun owners’ numbers from 1.5 million in 1998, when that law was passed, to just 200,000 today. It’s true that the gun murder rate has doubled, armed robberies increased 20.7 % and armed assaults are up 26.7%, but the citizens up there live in peace and harmony because they know that they’ve made their children safe. Their love and compassion for all people, especially misunderstood victims of the Bushcheney era, will overcome this poor man’s anger and gentle him down immediately.
“To those cowering behind their doors, hoping the bomber won’t burst into their homes, relax: Democrat party members are fanning out into the neighborhood as we speak, distributing “gun-free zone” posters, written in cyrillic, Urdu and Arabic on bright yellow oaktag to every homeowner who had the foresight to register with our party. Trust me, this is all the protection you’ll need because when he encounters such a sign our brother in peace will be filled with remorse, sink to his knees and apologize for losing his temper.
“I realize that the homophobic, deranged, obsessed faggot racist teabagging members of the NRA are poo-pooing our efforts to end this confrontation peacefully but I ask all of you this: which will make you feel safer, a colorful ‘no-guns allowed’ sign on your door or an AR-15? I think that questions answers itself. Certainly it does for me, and the countless victims of Bushcheney-loving gun nuts.”