Get it? Because his spine was severed in an accident and now he can’t walk. Good one, Zachary Roth.
That’s almost as hilarious as the original headline, which is still in the URL:
See, because he’s in a wheelchair.
Daily Archives: March 7, 2014
The same way liberals call blacks “house N…rs” and “Uncle Toms” and claim it’s okay “because liberals can’t be racists, by definition”.
Saturday, March 8th, between 12:30 and 2:00 PM, local and state politicians will gather at Greenwich Town Hall to celebrate the passage of Connecticut’s “Scary Gun Ban” and to demand still more. Although it might be fun for all licensed pistol owners and heck, all long gun owners (no permits required for those) to show up to respectfully object to their plans,I probably won’t bother; our locals are beyond reason.
I expect that our former Greenwich Poverty Housing chief – now Rockefeller flack Jonathan DuBois (French for “hewer of wood” – DuBoise’s ancestors used to cart fuel to heat the de la Fontaines’ chateaus) will be leading the charge tomorrow. I’ll give the ascot-choked, beret-affecting old geezer this: unlike Tesei, Theis, Marzullo and Himes, he makes no pretense about his intentions and his goals.
A 12:30 pm stop at Greenwich Town Hall, 101 Field Point Road, will feature Jonathan Perloe, Greenwich Council Against Gun Violence; Rep Himes; Connecticut Attorney General George Jepsen; Greenwich First Selectman Peter Tesei; Greenwich Selectmen Drew Marzullo and David Theis; Mr Frank; Dawn Spearman, founder, You are Not Alone of Bridgeport; Reverend Maxwell Grant, senior minister, Second Congregational Church of Greenwich; Ron Pinciaro, executive director, Connecticut Against Gun Violence; and Rabbi Andrew R. Sklarz, MSW, of Greenwich Reform Synagogue.
The Duke freshman who ratted out a classmate as a porn star is himself a prolific porn purchaser, a top skin-flick distributor claims.
Big-mouthed frat boy Thomas Bagley shells out $1,000 a month as a subscriber to hard-core porn site FacialAbuse.com, according to Mike Kulich, CEO of Monarchy Distribution.
“I would like to thank you for being such a fan of our business,” Kulich wrote in an open letter on the Internet to Bagley.
“I want to commend you for spending the $200 a week your parents send you every week for living expenses wisely. Facial Abuse is a great site! … I like your taste!”
“I want to also commend you on getting accepted into Duke. Great school! I am sure your parents are proud,” Kulich continued. “You are the type of guy that makes our business move.”
Bagley sparked a firestorm when he learned that a female freshman classmate was moonlighting as an adult film actress — and then blabbed to his friends.
In fact, Bagley did more than just “blab to his friends”. He confronted the girl and when she begged him not to publicize her after-school activities, he went right ahead anyway. Jerk.
65 Gregory Road, 2006 construction, $2.375 million ask, contract in 7 days. There was a previous sale in this range on Gregory, but everything else has been much, much lower. But those were old, original stock – welcome to the new.
They are the undisputed predators of the ocean, armed with razor-sharp teeth, capable of reaching speeds of 35mph – and now a great white shark could be headed towards Britain.
A ferocious predator – called Lydia – is currently just 1,000 miles of the coast of Cornwall and Ireland in the Atlantic.
And if she continues on her path, the 14.5ft, 2,000lb beast could arrive in British waters by Monday, which would make her the first great white to cross the Atlantic.
She was tagged as part of the Ocearch project, which aims to monitor sharks to learn more about their movements and Lydia’s progress can be followed on the project’s website.
She has swum more than 19,000 miles since a tracking device was fitted to her near Florida as part of the Ocearch scientific project.
She is currently near the mid-Atlantic ridge and researchers tracking her progress said she has travelled 380miles in just 72 hours.
Other than being generally related to real estate agents and lawyers, I don’t suppose this story has much relevance, but it’s kind of neat.
13 Richmond Drive, Old Greenwich, has been asking $1.695 since September. No one wanted it last fall, but today it’s reported as under contract.
68 Northridge, Havemeyer, has a contract 16 days after coming up for sale at $949,000. Needs a bump out and new everything, but good street, nice views, and well within current Havemeyer prices.
Obama and the girls are headed for Florida’s Ocean Reef Club. Membership is by invitation only, minimum net worth, $35 million. Better yet, if Barry does squeeze in a few rounds with his man friends (he won’t play sports with girls), he can tool around in a tax payer-subsidized golf cart. Win win.
That was the question posed to Garrett Morris in “Ask the General”, one of my favorite SNL skits back when SNL was funny. It’s been updated today, “Who would win a fistfight between Putin and Obama?”
Teachers in St. Francois County, Missouri, have complained after they were told part of their duties include being shot at with pellet guns during “active shooter” drills. Officials told the teachers they would be required to wear goggles to protect their eyes.
Missouri students and teachers are required by law to participate in active shooter drills. “In August 2013, the state legislature took a cue from a handful of post-Sandy Hook lawmakers, like the ones in Illinois and Arkansas, and voted to require every school district to conduct simulated shooter drills,” NBC News reports. Drills are “meant to help law enforcement craft strategies to take down active shooters, as well as to familiarize teachers with the sound of guns and teach them to act quickly.”
Active shooter drills conducted by police are now routine across the country. In rural Oregon last year, teachers were traumatized when masked men appeared unannounced at a high school in Halfway and burst into a teachers’ lounge and opened fire with blanks.
In 2013, in El Paso, Texas, the parents of students at a local high school were outraged when officials conducted an unannounced drill. Parent Stephanie Belcher told the New York Daily News she received a panicked text message from her son as the drill unfolded. “I’m not kidding,” the student told his mother. “There’s gunshots and people screaming and we were locked in a storage closet.”
Students at the North Lake College in Irving, Texas, were subjected to an unannounced shooter drill in October, 2012.
Less than a week after Sandy Hook, an elementary school in East Harlem, New York, conducted an unannounced exercise. The school was locked down and a woman’s voice said “shooter” and “intruder” over the school’s public address system. Police responded after a woman called 911. The incident was particularly troublesome due to the fact the school “serves 300 students with special needs, including those with severe emotional disabilities, autism, cerebral palsy and other disorders,” according to the New York Times.
In January of last year Illinois students in classrooms at the Cary-Grove High School endured police firing blanks in school hallways“in an effort to provide our teachers and students some familiarity with the sound of gunfire,” according to principal Jay Sargeant, CBS Chicago reported.
These are the people responsible for guarding our country and educating our children. Lucky us.
Al Gore launches emergency campaign for sweaters for penguins. “Poor little guys are freezing up there,” Gore told FWIW, “and while it will be 115° at the pole by 2015 – the science is settled on that – these birds need our love now. Won’t you help?”
*Penguins migrated from Antarctica to the North Pole when the southern ice sheets melted – little known fact.
The Board of Education on Thursday approved a request for an additional $2.37 million in contingency funds for the construction of the new performing arts complex at Greenwich High School, a move that responds to cost overruns produced by an unforeseen scope of environmental remediation work and construction delays.
The committee overseeing construction of the musical instruction space and auditorium project, known as MISA, made the request for the additional funding.
Ross acknowledged that the remediation needed to address contaminated soil in the MISA footprint has exceeded Building Committee members’ expectations.
“The types of contaminated soil that we had were in different areas, they were in larger areas than we thought, and they were at different elevations,” Ross said.
“There is more and deeper contaminated soil on the site than we originally thought?” board member Peter Sherr asked.
“That’s correct,” Ross replied.
Those environmental expenditures do not include the clean-up of contaminated soil underneath Greenwich High’s playing fields; that project is set to start this summer.
Ross also reported that the cofferdam surrounding the orchestra pit is now holding off major leakage.
School board members also pondered what challenges could emerge during the next planned construction phase — demolition of the current auditorium and construction of instructional music spaces in that footprint.
“Is that a concern of yours, that when we start digging in the instructional space, we’re going to find more surprises?” Adriana Ospina asked.
“There has been little environmental testing by us, because it was an active auditorium, so for me to say that we’ve tested and that there’s no evidence of that wouldn’t be correct,” Ross responded.
I speak Jive – Ross is saying, “you bet your ass.”