Blogging hasn’t felt so entertaining recently, but the world continues to be inspirational.

Green Acres

Green Acres

Barbara Streisand, who urged her fans to air-dry their clothes during 2002’s energy “crisis” and was then discovered to have kept her own electric dryers going full time (when asked if Streisand herself was using a backyard clothesline, her spokesman said: “She never meant that it necessarily applied to her.”) is back in the news again, this time for keeping her Malibu mansion lush and green while the little people are being told to “if it’s yellow, let it mellow, if it’s brown, flush it down”.


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24 responses to “Blogging hasn’t felt so entertaining recently, but the world continues to be inspirational.

  1. my father never liked her

    self promoter … she uses a 5 mile per gallon trailer / office to do business on the hr drive to an la studio … energy saver … right!

  2. Cos Cobber

    Hey buddy, your blogging always feels great to us. Your fans love your work.

  3. Anonymous

    What CC said.

  4. Cobra

    Agree, CC.

  5. housecat

    Good to have you back. Hope all’s okay Chez Fountaine.

  6. Live Free or Die

    “Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right”

    Welcome back and stay strong.

  7. Mark B.

    I’ve never begrudged a rich person for their lifestyle.
    But I never cease to be amazed by liberal in-your-face hypocrisy.

    • Exactly. Did you catch the story of all the celebrities who flew their private jets to Washington a few weeks ago so they could climb aboard Air Force One with Obama and travel to Florida to celebrate Earth Day and urge the shut down of our economy for the sake of global warming?

  8. Walt

    Bozo Nose–
    Good to hear from you.

    What have you been up to? Feeling sorry and melancholy? I hope not, because that really does no one any good. Especially you. Enjoy the now. Because that is all any of us really have. And we tend to piss it away. So just remember that. You loser.

    Don’t fret the stuff you can’t control. It does no good. And speaking of piss, It’s like not eating asparagus because it makes your piss smell. Or wondering why it makes your piss smell. NO ONE KNOWS AND NO ONE CARES!!

    So enjoy the asparagus, and don’t worry about the smell of your piss. Does that make sense? I am actually eating asparagus right now. No, really. Want to smell my piss so you know I am telling the truth?

    Anyhows, you actually need inspiration to type this drivel that you call “writing”? REALLY!! Who do you think you are? ERNEST FRIGGING HEMINGWAY? Who you so despise. You hack.

    Calling your prose “writing” is like calling selling dirt a “profession”. Oh…but wait. You actually do that.

    Anyhows again, I always thought you just sat in front of your computer, in your mustard stained disgusting little wife beater, with your skid marked, crust infested bikini briefs – with horizontal skid marks, not vertical, BTW – which should concern you – and hacked away at the key board like a retarded little monkey. THAT’S WHAT I DO!!

    Anyhows, FOR THE THIRD TIME!! If you want to get cheered up, we can do brunch anytime. I will do the “pull my finger” joke for the waitress. They always like that.

    Glad you are back.
    Your Pal,

    • Try planting your own asparagus Walt. It’s such an easy veggie to grow and the crop is right about now – usually from Mother’s Day for about a month. The difference in taste from store bought pencils to the real deal is incredible. Dab o’butter, sprinkle of salt – voila. Dinner.

      • Anonymous

        We’ve been growing asparagus for a few years now .. my pee doesn’t smell bad after consumption, unlike the store-bought asparagus!

        • That’s so true – it must be how the store-bought in grown in hothouses that causes the chemical reaction far more, or at all, versus the homegrown.

          How’s your crop this year? Ours varies – last year it wasn’t anywhere near as good as this year.

  9. Toonces

    Hello CF, glad you’re back. Walt that was one of your grosser posts. Now I am going to the store to get some asparagus and see what happens cuz I never noticed that.

      • Toonces

        Like minds think alike….. ! EOSR I was just now reading about that on the Smithsonian web site! Very interesting. Especially the part that some people don’t produce the smell. Except, EXCEPT, as Walt would say: they aren’t sure whether some people don’t produce the smell or whether their noses aren’t able to SMELL/perceive it. This sounds very strange to me, because by now they should have had a multi-million dollar government funded study to find out the truth. Methinks they’d only need a Walt or someone to smell the pee and tell is if it smelled! The things I learn here……

        • Walt

          EOSR –
          The chance of me growing vegetables is about as likely as the Dude writing a best seller. IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN!! I am not gay, but I like Whole Foods for the veggies.

          Toonces –
          One of my grosser posts? They are all meant to be gross!! You offend me!! Does that mean you found all my previous post’s to be socially acceptable? if so, I AM A BIGGER LOSER THAN THE DUDE!!

          Anyhows, you live in Greenwich, right? Which means you must have more than one pisser, correct? Not you, I mean the house. I have 6 BTW. Not that I am bragging. I just piss a lot.

          So do this. Go piss in one now. THEN go buy the asparagus. Piss in another bathroom after you have eaten the asparagus. Use EOSR’s recipe. When you are done, I will come over and sniff test out the asparagus bathroom. Please try not to fart as it can skew the results. This is science, so please be serious.

          Here is more proof:

          How educational is this blog!!

          • Toonces

            I knew it, I knew it!! I knew you’d offer to help. Going to Whole foods now to buy Asparagus and maybe run into Walt because we know he goes there for the chicks not the veggies. And you’re right of course, all your posts, well almost all, are disgusting and I love them.

        • housecat

          Walt, does this mean the anti-aging experiment is over?

        • anonymous

          housecat: winner winner chicken dinner. Best. Comment. Of. The. Week. Month. Year.

        • housecat

          Aw c’mon. It wasn’t *that* bad, anon.

    • Walt

      Housecat – Now that made me laugh!! But to seriously answer your question, I am a man of many interests. Asparagus piss being just one of them.

      I am also fascinated by explosive bowel movements, vaginal farts, and girls with tramp stamps. Especially girls with tramp stamps.

      Nymphomaniacs interest me, as do lesbians. The lipstick kind, not the bull dykes. I never understood them, but I also must admit I never tried. Why bother? I am also fascinated by midgets and dwarfs, and I never understood why dogs don’t live longer. That always made me sad. The dog’s, not the midgets. Let’s put pierced nipples on the list while we are at it. I need to look into that more deeply.

      And I am conducting a lifelong study to conclusively prove liberals are really just retards, but Francis keeps running away. He is like the Holy Grail to conclude my study.

      But anti-aging remains my number one interest. I will never give up on that one, and dedicate all my efforts towards it. I hope this answers the question.

  10. Toonces – how much longer do we have to wait?? I presume you got asparagus? How’s that pee? What did Walt determine?
    Inquiring minds want to know!!