Republicans whine that Demmerkrats are stealing their roadside campaign signs. If they are, well good for them – I just wish they’d take their own down too. But while Peter Tesei is knotting his underpants over this non-issue, he remains blissfully unaware of what’s really going on in town: the Democrats are passing out street money to down-and-out Republicans to wreak havoc on Tuesday.
Oh yes,I know this. Frankie Fudrucker is, of course, the Democrat Boss here in town and I’ve witnessed a steady stream of wan, haggard men, reeking of gin and dressed in whale pants and blazers with the faint outlines of the RHC crest ripped from the breast while being expelled for nonpayment of dues, shuffling into our offices, collecting some folding money from Fudrucker and heading back to Augie’s. It’s pathetic.
And what will these former financiers do? They’ll be getting out the vote, of course. Those whose Beemers haven’t been repossessed will drive their carless colleagues to the poll, with a promise that a vote for Lavery will get them a shot and a beer afterwards. Oh, the humanity!
And if I were the Republicans, that’s what I’d be yelling about.